- 'Here's to alcohol- the cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems.' Homer Simpson
- 'I drink to make other people interesting.' Groucho Marx
- 'I never drink water. The reason being fish make love in it.' W C Fields
- A doctor is speaking to a patient after examination. 'There are two reasons for your poor health, it's entirely due to drinking and smoking.' 'That’s a relief,' replies the patient. 'I thought you were going to say it was my fault.
- 'Why is American beer served cold?' 'So you can tell it from urine.' David Moulton
- A drunk goes to court. The judge says, 'You've been brought here for drinking.' The drunk says, 'Great. Let's get started.'
- A drunk phones the offices of Alcoholics Anonymous. 'Is that AA?' ask the drunk. 'Yes,' says the switchboard operator. 'Would you like to join?' 'No,' says the drunk. 'I'd like to resign.'
- A drunk staggers in a Catholic church late one night and collapses in the confessional. Next morning he's awoken by the sound of the priest entering the cubicle next to him. The priest addresses him through the grille. 'Good morning, my son. What can I do for you?' 'You got here just in time,' replies the drunk. 'Could you pass over some toilet paper?'
- A man goes into a pub and says, 'I'd like something tall, icy and full of gin.' The barmen turns and shouts into the kitchen, 'Oi, Doris! Someone to see you!'
- A man orders a pint of beer, notices it tastes sour and complains to the barman. 'What are you moaning about?' says the barman. 'You've only got a pint of that rubbish, I've got three barrels full.'
- A man spends all night drinking at a pub. When it's time to go he stands up and falls flat on his face, so he decides to crawl outside in the hope the fresh air will sober him up. Once outside he stands up and falls over, so he has to crawl the half-mile to his house. When he gets home he manages to prop himself upright so he can unlock the front door, then falls on his face again and crawls up the stairs. When he reaches his bed he tries to stand one last time but collapses and falls fast asleep. The next morning he's woken by his wife shouting, 'You've been out on the booze again, haven't you!' 'What makes you says that?' asks the man. 'Don't bother to lie about it!' shout his wife. 'The pub rang, you left your wheelchair behind again!'
- A policeman spots a man driving very erratically. He pulls the man over and asks him if he's been drinking. 'Yeah,' replies the man. 'Me and my friends stopped by this pub where I had six or seven pints. Then we went to a bar where they serve these great margaritas so I had four of those. Then I stopped on the way home, got a bottle of whisky, and drank that too.' The policeman says, 'Sir, you need to step out of the car and take a breathalyser test.' Indignantly, the man replies, 'Why? Don't you believe me?'
- I never drink unless I'm alone or with somebody.
- Rehab is for quitters.
- A drunk staggers to the men’s room of a large restaurant. On his way back to his seat he stops and asks a young woman if he stepped on her foot a few minutes ago. 'Yes,' she replies testily. 'Yes, you did.' 'Great,' he replies. 'I knew my table was around here somewhere.'
- Two drunks are sitting side by side in a bar. One of the drunks goes to the bathroom but neglects to buttons up his fly when he's finished. He staggers back to the bar, sits on the bar stool, and his penis flops out of the bartop. The other drunk yells. 'Snake!' and hits the penis with the bottle. The first drunk shouts, 'Hit it again! It just bit me!'
- 'I was tired one night and I went to the bar to have a few drinks. The bartender asked me, 'What'll you have?' I said, 'Surprise me.' He showed me a naked picture of my wife.' Rodney Dangerfield
- A man is sitting in a bar staring at his drink. After staring at it for half an hour without taking a sip, one of the bar regulars decides to have some fun with him. He picks up the man's drink and knocks it back in one. The man starts crying. 'Don't take it like that,' says the regular. 'It was a joke. I'll buy you another one.' 'It's not just that,' replies the man. 'This day has been the worst one of my life. First, I oversleep and get into work late. My boss fires me and, when I leave the building, I find my car had been stolen. I get a cab home but leave my briefcase on the back seat with my wallet in it. Then, when I get home, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. After all that I come to this bar and then, when I've just made up my mind to end it all, you show up and drink my poison...'
- A man walks into a bar and orders a drink, then discovers he has to go to the bathroom. To stop anyone stealing his drink he puts a note on it saying, 'I spat in this beer.' When he returns he finds another note saying, 'So did I.'
- A man walks into a bar and orders 20 pints of Guinness. He lines them up on the bar and announces that he'll give Rs. 1000 to the man who can drink all of them. Patrick sticks up his hand and say he'd like a go if the man can wait half an hour. Patrick than leaves the pub, comes back 30 minutes later and downs the 20 pints one after another. The man is impressed and hands over the money, ‘But tell me,' he asks, Where did you go to for that half an hour?' 'Ah, well,' said Patrick. 'Before I took your bet I popped to the pub next door to see if I could do it.'
- A man walks into a bar and says to the bartender, 'I want you to give me 12-year scotch, and don't try to feel me, because I can tell the difference.' The bartender is sceptical and decides to try to trick the man with five-year scotch. The man takes a sip, scowls and says, 'Bartender, this crap is five-year scotch. I told you I want 12-year scotch.' The bartenders tries once more with eight year scotch. The man takes a sip, grimaces and says, 'Bartender, I don't want eight-year scotch. Give me 12-year scotch!' Impressed, the bartender gets the 12-year scotch. The man takes a sip and sighs, 'Ah, now that's the real thing.' A drunk has been watching this with great interest. He stumbles over, sets a glass down in front of the man, and says, 'Hey, try this one.' The man takes a sip and immediately spits a glass down in front of the man, and says, 'Hey, try this one.' The man takes a sip and immediately spits it out again, 'Yechhh! This stuff tastes like piss!' The drunk says, 'Yeah. Now how old am I?
It was years ago, the word cheer originally came from the Latin word for face (referred to facial expression) or countenance. The very first record of cheers expression could be found in the 18th century as a shout of encouragement or support. Nowadays it has many different meanings, depends which context it's used in. As a toast, cheers became from "Good cheer" in the early 20th century.
Either you travel abroad and you'd like to impress locals or just you'd like to surprise your foreign friends, spread your knowledge and learn how to say cheers in different countires! Believe it or not, cheers!(including the translation of other languages) is one of the most used word (expression) around the world.
|Austria||Prosit! Prost! Zum Wohl! (formal)|
|Brazil||Saude! (to your health), Tim tim!|
|Bulgaria||Na zdorov'ya! (to your health)|
|Costa Rica||Pura Vida! (pure life)|
|Croatia||Živjeli! (to life/health)|
|Czech Republic||Na zdraví! (to your health)|
|Denmark||Skaal! / Skål!|
|Dominican Republic||Salud! (health)|
|France||Santé! À votre santé! (to your health)|
|Germany||Prost! Zum Wohl! (formal)|
|Greece||Yamas! Geiá mas! (health)|
|Hungary||Egészségedre! (to your health)|
|Ireland||Sláinte! (to your health), Cheers!|
|Israel||L'Chaim! (to life!)|
|Italy||Cin cin! Salute!|
|Latvia||Uz veselibu! (to your health)|
|Macedonia||Na zdravje! (to your health)|
|Malta||Cheers! Eviva! (old fashioned)|
|Netherlands||Gezondheid! (to your health), Proost!|
|Poland||Na zdrowie! (to your heath) Saude! (to your health), Tchin tchin!|
|Romania||Noroc! (God Bless!)|
|Russia||Na zdorov'ya! (to your health)|
|Scotland||Sláinte! (to your health)|
|Serbia & Montenegro||Ziveli! (let's live long!)|
|Slovakia||Na zdravie! (to your heath)|
|South Africa||Cheers! Gesondheid! (to your health)|
|Spain||Salud! (health) Topa! (Basque)|
|Sweden||Skaal! / Skål!|
|Switzerland||Proscht! Gesundheit! (to your health)|
|Thailand||Chai yo! Choc tee!|
|Trinidad and Tobago||Cheers!|
|Ukraine||Na zdorov'ya! Budmo! (let's live long!)|
|USA||Cheers! Bottoms up!|
|Wales||Iechyd da! [Yechidda!]|